If you're reading this, you probably already saw all the uploads I did yesterday that signal the end of another semester. Also be sure to check out my new fully armed and operational battlestation www.jameslaslavic.com if you haven't yet!

Alright, I've uploaded a few more stuff from school because an old friend of mine asked to see my work. I still don't think it's terribly exciting stuff, personally. Mostly just studying different principles and elements of design. Very foundational stuff. Not that foundational can't be interesting. You know what I mean though.

Anyway, I'd upload a few more, but I've got to pack since I'm flying back up to San Francisco later today. Back to work, work, work.

Being that it's just my first year of college, the work isn't really all that interesting yet, but I'll try to upload more of it.

I've pretty much been a leech on Deviant Art for quite a few months now, just looking at other people's work and not really uploading any of my own. Part of this was because some clients didn't want me posting anything before they did (and they haven't yet gotten off the ground), and part of this was because I was traveling quite a bit anyway.

Right now, I've got three shindigs going, which I think is a good number since it's not as hectic as I've been in the past but still gives me stuff to do when I'm not coming up with masterpiece schemes and performances for the bunch of kangaroos playing in my Dungeons & Dragons campaign.

The first client on my list is a jazz talk show on Smooth Jazz 1490 called "A Jazz Life." It turns out that the host of the show is actually a friend's mother. So that's kind of nice.

My pro bono client right now is a community of helpful programmers simply called Friendly Coders who are basically volunteer gurus waiting for people to ask them pretty much any question about how to do pretty much anything in pretty much any programming language. Nice people.

And the third shindig on my list is Visual Flavor, which is my own pet project.  Christopher and I finally got a couple more coders interested in joining the staff, so we're bouncing around feature lists and site layout wireframes. I should probably get back to work on developing the logo candidates, heh.

So I'll try to post work from those things for you. Oh, and also, as I fiddle around and add random things to my portfolio I'll add that stuff to possibly (as long as it isn't too random or weird for the rest of the world; my sketchbooks are a pretty scary place, as my Picasso-like fifth grade art can prove).

Haven't really been updating the Deviant Art journal, really. Meh. That's why you should read the actual blog [link] I suppose. Anyway, got this one from Kendrachu. It's kind of funny, because she's actually been one of my examples of a person who is definitely not shy but answered a lot of these questions and now thinks that she's 60% shy. Tee hee. "Blushes really easily." Right, Kendra, because you're just so uncomfortable about human anatomy and all. XD

[ ]You don't like public speaking.
[X] You find it hard to talk to strangers.
[ ] You don't like to look people in the eye.
[X] You hate using public restrooms. (Hate is probably too strong of a word, really. I just like my privacy is all, and can tell when I'm not getting it.)
[ ] You don't like to go shopping alone.
TOTAL: 2

[ ] Being introduced to new people makes you nervous.
[ ] When you're in a group of people, it's difficult to think of what to say
[X] You have a lot of trouble talking to the opposite sex
[ ] You don't like answering the door
TOTAL: 1

[ ] You can't stand people watching you
[ ] One on one conversation makes you nervous
[X] You don't like to ask people for help
[ ] You hate to read out loud
[ ] You don't like answering questions from adults.
TOTAL: 1

[ ] you dread ordering food at restaurants.
[X] You are uncomfortable at parties, unless you know everyone well.
[ ] You don't like to talk around certain people, because you're afraid of being embarrassed by what you say.
[ ] You wish you were more outgoing.
[ ] You hate being in the center of attention
TOTAL: 1

[ ] you don't know how to react to compliments.
[X] You prefer reading, writing, or listening to music than being around too many people.
[X] You blush easily. (Apparently the sport of the year is "Let's Make James Blush" all of a sudden.)
[X] You spend a lot of time in your room.
[X] You don't like talking about personal things.
TOTAL: 4

OVER ALL TOTALS: 9/24, or 37.5% shy.

Choose Seven Characters:
1) Aloysius
2) Malekatith
3) Tasif
4) Chankrisna
5) Brin
6) Kazuo
7) Damek

Questions for Number 1: Aloysius

What's your height?: 5'7"

Your age?: I'm about twenty, I think.

You in love?: I have a few mental issues that I don't really talk about. I'm not insane though, I swear. But one of my stronger phobias is of women, but can you blame me? Not too long ago, I thought one was different. I don't know what that was. I'd never felt that way before, like somebody actually wanted me to be safe and at peace. But I've caught on to her now, and now I know that she was just herding me from one dungeon to another to be tortured and experimented on by various groups!

Do you take school seriously?: I never had the chance to go to school, to say the least. Every so often, a torturer would make a mistake so that I'd pass out instead of staying conscious, and so whenever that happened, there was a chance that an angel or something would come and play with me or teach me something in my "dream." Never lasted long, but when they were teaching me stuff, I sure listened, and then when I woke up and the torture resumed, I'd try to focus on me lessons to distract myself.

Hated by anyone?: You kidding? Some people hate me, some call it "willing to sacrifice his humanity to save everybody else's," but what's it matter? The whole world seems to just want to put me through every kind of torture imaginable. That's basically my life!

Ever slept with anyone?: Well, not willingly. The torturers kind of left me just a wee bit on the traumatized side as far as this goes. I don't like to talk about it. Just don't mind me if I prefer to wear heavier clothing, especially my scarf.

How do you feel about us asking you these questions?: For me to be answering these questions, I'll bet I'm drugged. But at least I know I'm drugged. Why can't you just let me go? I'm so tired of being drugged.

Questions for Number 2: Malekatith

What's your height?: Whatever I want it to be. Foolish mortal.

Your age?: I watched while god created time. Oh yes, I was there. Don't think too much about it though, because your tiny intellect probably won't be able to grasp things like this.

You in love?: Love is an urge, a foolish primal urge that pollutes your mind and erodes free will. I will destroy love, among other things. It's on my to-do list.

Do you take school seriously?: The better question is whether schools take me seriously, being that I'm the one who invented magic and witnessed the creation of logic and even the raw concept of school itself. Weakling.

Hated by anyone?: Only by those too mentally small and cosmically insignificant to grasp the true nobility of my mission. Oh, and hatred is another urge, and thus is on my to-do list as well.

Ever slept with anyone?: More primal urges? Waste of time. Not that time itself isn't a waste.

How do you feel about us asking you these questions? It's of no consequence. I'm still going to destroy the third dimension, and then we'll all exist as concepts once more in the infinitieth dimension!

Questions for Number 3: Tasif

What's your height?: Oh, I'd say about six feet tall, mate.

Your age?: Aww, who counts the years? I think I was born about eighteen years ago, but I'll have birthday parties whenever I feel like it, love.

You in love?: Naah. I like being the one to get the treasure, so why would I want to have to give it to some girly?

Do you take school seriously?: Ha. Ahaha. Ahahahahahaha.

Hated by anyone?: Ya know ye love me. I get along with everybody, ay?

Ever slept with anyone?: 'Course I have.

How do you feel about us asking you these questions? Cheeky, mate.

Questions for Number 5: Chankrisna

What's your height? Oh, I'm only four feet tall, if that.

Your age?: Forgive me, my friend, but it's been too long since I've celebrated a birthday to know.

You in love?: As the warden of the Shrine of the Hundred Hands, I'm celibate.

Do you take school seriously?: Discipline, discipline, discipline! You must give yourself fully to walking the path from the first step to the last if you wish to be a monk! When I was your age, nobody ever had to ask me twice to do my studies!

Hated by anyone?: I can only humbly wish that nobody truly hates me, but it is not my place to do anything more than make that wish. We must always do what we believe is right. Perhaps this will earn me more supporters than enemies, and perhaps it won't. But I do try to serve everybody as if they were my family, and I unconditionally love all, even those that strike against me and those that force me to strike against them.

Ever slept with anyone?: No.

How do you feel about us asking you these questions?: Oh, I don't mind at all. It's nice to talk to somebody for the first time in... How long has it been? I can't recall. But yes, my friend, it is my honor to help satisfy such a curious mind.

Questions for Number 6: Kazuo

What's your height?: I'm five feet foot nine.

Your age?: Twenty-five.

You in love?: Love doesn't pay the mortgage.

Do you take school seriously?: Graduated top of my class from the academy. *Flicks his cigarette over his shoulder.* Wouldn't say it stressed me out or anything though.

Hated by anyone?: The people who would hate me are all dead from the reason they have to hate me, and their families will never know my name. So in a sense, no.

Ever slept with anyone?: Every once in a while back at the academy, sure. It was a way to pass time.

How do you feel about us asking you these questions?: Absolutely fine. *Lights up another cigarette, not even looking at you.* I've already drugged you, so you won't remember a thing.

Questions for Number 7: Damek

What's your height?: I'm precisely six feet and five inches tall.

Your age?: Thirty-five years.

You in love?: With fulfilling my duties.

Do you take school seriously?: I trained hard when I was younger, yes.

Hated by anyone?: Goes without saying.

Ever slept with anyone?: No. Never had the time to get close. Always more important things to do. It's important that somebody makes sure that those who have forgotten the goddess of mystery and magic be... reminded.

How do you feel about us asking you these questions?: If you intend to spread this information in a positive light, then fine. If you intend to spread this information in a negative light however, then... Well, you won't.


Who sent this to you? Kendrachu

Now tag five people: I also tag whoever has characters they want to do this for.

A snippit from my actual blog:

"They put me on two different kinds of morphine (who knew that there was a 'morphine family?') via an IV and gave me a catscan, and sure enough, I had a two millimeter kidney stone."

Read the rest and leave your comments over on the blog! [link]

1) Full Name: James Andrews Laslavic

2) Male/Female: Male

3) Were you named after anyone?: My father. The males from my father's side in my family pass the name James down.

4) Does your name mean anything?: Successor. Which is why it makes sense to be an heirloom name.

5) Nick Name(s): Gandhi, Lego, Professor, Grandpa. These are the nicknames that others have given me.

6) What do you think you look like... name wise: I am the James that all other James' are certified by.

7) Date Of Birth: November 28, 1988. 5:55 AM.

8) Place of Birth and Current Location: Born in Oceanside, CA. Live in Coronado, CA.

9) Nationality: Slavic, Balkan, Hungarian, Hebrew, German, Columbian, Moroccan, Egyptian, Scandinavian, and many others from throughout Eurasia both known and unknown (I'm adopted, so we're still learning).

10) Astrology Sign: Sagittarius or Scorpio depending on the source. Apparently not everybody agrees on how to translate the old Greek calendar to our calendar system or something.

11) Chinese Astrology Sign: Dragon.

12) Religion: Catholic, but I actually do have some shinto-like beliefs as well that I find perfectly compatible. Call me a worshiper of truth and love.

13) Whats your favorite smell?: Spices like cinammon and nutmeg, sometimes with a hint of orange and sometimes without.

14) Political Position?: I am non-partisan and non-label. A number of persistent people from all sides of the political spectrum regularly try to convince me that I'm with them, but the fact of the matter is that I don't give a damn about names, and I cherrypick my positions on issues.

15) What do you prefer to drink in the morning?: Milk first, and then a good tea. Spiced black tea is good for the morning on the way to school.

16) Hair + Eye color: Dark brown for both.

17) Do you look like anyone famous?: I don't think so, but I'm not very good when it comes to knowing the famous folk.

18) What do you look like?: I'm 5'8" and have a weight somewhere between 120 and 125 lbs. I used to compete pretty seriously in karate and archery, and the word used to describe my physical appearance most often is still "emaciated," although I prefer "wiry." And since the treatment I'm on makes me look puffy among other things, I don't think emaciated works anymore. I've apparently always got a really serious expression.

19) Any unusual talents?: I can juggle, make a popping/clicking noise with my mouth that nobody else can, flip my eyelids inside out, slow and speed up my heartbeat and pulse when I meditate, and dream lucidly.

20) Righty, Lefty, or Ambidextrous?: Righty.

21) Gay, Straight, Bi, or Other?: Straight, I think. You've got to understand though that my entire endocrine system was shot, and we only just got it diagnosed properly a year ago. So this is all still pretty new and weird to me, heh.

22) What do you do for a living?: I'm a student, but I make money for myself as a freelance graphic artist and occasionally by helping people with their computers too.

23) What do you do for fun?: Daydream and memories. I'm finally allowed to start exercising again a little bit, which means that hopefully karate and archery aren't far away, but yeah, I'm still kind of limited to my thoughts. I can do things like write stories, too. And of course, I can make art, too. But yeah, I'm sick of this shit. I've got a sort of introverted personality anyway but I'm really ready for this all to be done and for the doctors to tell me I'm better. I want to play with my friends again. Grr.

24) What are your favorite art materials to work with?: Photoshop, Illustrator, and Dreamweaver are the three design programs I use the most. I love my tablet notebook, too, and you can't knock good old fashioned sketchbooks either.

25) What kind of materials would you like to work with?: There are several 3D programs I wish I knew how to use, like Maya or Cinema4D or Blender. You get the idea.

26) Have you met your grandparents?: Yes, I felt close to my grandmothers when they were still alive but I don't remember either of my grandfathers, sadly.

27) Boyfriend/Girlfriend: I don't think I'm much to desire as a boyfriend, and I think that everybody else knows this too. That's not me trying to be emo, that's just a truth. I've learned to live with it, and I can joke to myself about it even.

28) Crush: I've only ever had two crushes. The first I never pursued because I was and still am terrified of girls. I'll always wonder if she liked me that way, but now she's gone in more than one way, and she's happy. I still wonder about her sometimes, as she'll always be a friend I trust no matter what, even if she never knows. Heh, she won't see this though because she doesn't do Deviant Art. The second is more recent. I'm still terrified of girls, but I feel like I successfully forced myself to do at least something. Needless to say, shit happened to me from all kinds of people and on top of that I worry sometimes that I weirded the girl out and lead to her distancing herself from me, and so now that crush has been stretched by some and ignored by others in such a way that I now operate under the assumption that the person has no interest in me whatsoever. I was disillusioned about girls in general for a while as a result, but now, I guess I got so used to it that I just smile and sip pina coladas. I've been keeping my eyes open, but yeah, I'm just a little tired of being jerked around. I just want to play with my friends now. If anybody interesting appears, great. If not, great. Call it the pina colada mentality.

29) What celebrity would you date if you could?: I don't pay attention to celebrities.

30) Current worries?: Medical. I plan to overcome all of this shit, but there always is the "What if?" It's really unsettling when you overhear little things that the doctors and your parents say, and it doesn't help when they later say, "It's all going to work out." I haven't done everything I want to do yet, and I'll feel really cheated if everything can be summed up as "did lots of school." But I'm doing well. And again, I'm not done kicking yet, so there.

31) Favorite online Guy/Girl(s): Russell Coniff and Christopher Villareal. I know Russell in real life too, but he counts here. Ever since I got sick, I haven't really been able to play with my friends to much, and I don't blame them for playing without me one bit. But yeah, Russell and Christopher talk to me regularly, and that's great. I at least see others at school and on some weekends too, but yeah. These two people in particular make me feel remembered.

32) Favorite place to be?: Wow. I guess the grass field during lunch, now that I think about it. Simple, but I don't exactly get to go to many places, heh. I dream of Borders though. Oh man, I love Borders. Lots of good memories at Borders even if nothing hugely amazing ever happened there, you know? And it's just awesome anyway. Montecito Sequoia, now that's another awesome place. Arrooo. Heh, all the places besides the grass at lunch are memories. Wow. Moving on.

33) Least favorite place to be?: I like my room... almost as much as I'm sick of it.

34) Do you burn or tan?: I've never gotten a sunburn in my life, actually. I tan.

35) Ever break a bone?: Yes, and I've got a soapy story to go with it. Apparently when I was a really little boy, I really liked to climb, but what I really wanted to do was fly. So one day at Spreckles, I kept jumping off the very top of the playground over and over, and eventually broke my foot. But nobody realized it. The next day my family went to Disneyland and I was apparently complaining about walking a lot and about my foot hurting, so we went to the doctor, who told us what the deal was.

36) What is your favorite cereal?: I'm actually not supposed to have cereal in the morning anymore! Weird, huh? But Mango Passion Harmony cereal was awesome, heh heh.

37) Person you cry with: When the pain in my muscles was really bad, I'd try to hold it back, but when it hurt too much, Sparky was always there for me and she'd let me bury my face in her side. Sparky is the only pure thing in this world.

Do You Have...

38) Any sisters: One.

39) Any brothers: Zero.

40) Any pets: One dog, Sparky.

41) An Illness: Being that my list of shit literally fills up half a page and none of you are doctors anyway, here's how I've been summing it up for people who ask: severe endocrine failure and autoimmune system malfunction with side orders of fibromyalgia, hypoglycemia, and other shit. And it's all related. My glands (adrenal, thyroid, etc) are not producing nearly enough, what they do produce my body doesn't use efficiently, and my immune system has decided to attack the glands and the proteins just because it wasn't screwy enough. And this lead directly to the rest of my body getting lame at doing things, hence the milo fasciitis, fibromyalgia, hypoglycemia, etc. It's super amazingly awesometasticalicious. BUT treatment is working, and I'm still around, so every day is a good day!

42) A Pager: Nope.

43) A Personal phone line: No.

44) A Cell phone: Yup.

45) A visible birthmark: Nope

46) A Pool or hot tub: No.

47) A Car: A super awesome 2003 Jetta. Small cars for the win.

Describe Your...

48) Personality: According to others, I'm frustrating because "it's hard to guess what I'm thinking." I guess that makes me mysterious and reserved, which I guess I'd agree with since I'm definitely not at all an open person by any means. I believe in unconditional love, and yet I'm not trusting of other people. At first glance that might seem contradictory, but I don't think it is. Consider it for a second. There's a reason why it needs to be unconditional. That's part of why I think it's admirable. I've got my walls and masks, because the fact of the matter is that whether or not this world is filled with good or kind people, it is definitely filled with people who are such opportunists that they will either consciously or reflexively make you regret having any weakness or letting them know anything deep about you. There are few exceptions to this rule, and it's not worth letting down the walls to find out who they are. I'm envious in a way of people who are more open, but on the other hand, I don't really believe anybody is as open as they say they are. At least I can admit that I have walls and masks for when the walls aren't good enough to deter people. So as far as my personality type goes, I'd have to agree that I'm introverted, intuitive, feeling, and judging (INFJ).

49) Driving: Safety freaking first. Apparently I'm "too patient," and I drive slower than the rest of my friends. Heh heh. That's fine by me.

50) Your clothing style: I wear clothes that I find artistically interesting without being anything that'd be "too much" or put me in the spotlight or anything. More and more I find myself dressing as the stereotypical graphic artist. I don't obsess over my clothing though, and I don't hesitate to do anything that'd mess it up either (like wrestle).

51) Room: I keep it fairly neat, but I'm relaxed about it. I'm not above throwing a pair of pants over my chair or making piles of books and papers.

52) What's missing: Posters and things on my wall. I've got two really awesome posters (an Indiana Jones poster and a Star Wars poster), but yes, there's definitely too much wallspace.

53) School: Coronado High School.

54) Bed: Freaking falling apart. My heartbeat can make it squeak if I lie down in the middle, and I've taped a small pillow to the other side of the headboard to keep it from bumping into the wall every time  either my dog or I move. But it's big and comfortable, and the fact that Sparky is content with it means that it's suitable for the gods, hehe.

55) Relationship with your parent(s): Good. They trust me completely, and they're right to do so. We really do respect and love each other.

56) Do You believe in yourself: I haven't decided whether or not I'm flat out arrogant or not, which of course means I am. But on the other hand, I have no problem admitting other people are better at me at things when I really think they are. I try to accurately place myself in the world, and I don't think there's any shame in recognizing when somebody is better at you at something (because then you can catch up and beat them later!). I just happen to rate myself pretty high in a lot of categories. Hence the arrogance. Oh well.

57) Do you believe in love at first sight?: Yes. No. Sure. Why not.

58) Consider yourself a good listener: Yes.

59) Have a future dream that you would like to share?: I qualified to compete in Okinawa before I got the diagnosis and stuff. I dream of getting back into karate, and qualifying to compete internationally again.

60) Get Along with your parents: Yup.

61) Save your e-mail conversations: Gmail, bitch. Archiving and deleting are equally easy, so why not?

62) Pray: Yes.

63) Believe in reincarnation: No.

64) Brush your teeth twice a day?: Yes.

65) Like to talk on the phone: Actually, usually not. I'm more comfortable with the written word usually. I'm not good at idle chatter. You know, when people talk to you and don't have anything to say.

66) Like to eat?: Don't get me wrong, I can definitely enjoy the taste of good food, but even so, I still feel like it's fundamentally just a biological chore and wish I didn't have to eat in a weird way. I guess I just don't like that it's something I have to do instead of choose to do. But yeah. I like food that tastes good, and I'll eat whenever I get hungry until I'm not.

67) Like to exercise?: I can't wait to to be as strong and spry as I used to be.

68) Like to watch sports?: Not on the television, typically.

69) Sing in the car?: I'll sing whenever I damn well please.

70) What is a dream that you have all the time?: I haven't had a dream in a long time now. It's kind of disappointing because I used to have lucid dreams.

71) Dream in color: See above.

72) Do you have nightmares?: Yes but see above. It's hard to explain to people who don't have lucid dreams how you can have a lucid nightmare, but you can. So maybe it isn't perfectly lucid then? Hmm.

73) Sleep with a stuffed animal: I need a stuffed animal to fall asleep when I'm away from Sparky, or else I'm afraid to close my eyes.

74) Right next to you: Sparky.

75) On your favorite coffee cup?: A picture of the mountains that reminds me of Montecito.

76) On your mouse pad: My screen! Hahaha. Tablet laptop. Get it?

77) Your favorite flavor of gum?: Citrus.

78) Your brand of deodorant?: Axe.

79) Your dream honeymoon spot: Somewhere exotic. The more culture shock, the better.

80) Your dream husband/wife: Somebody as loyal and sincere as me.

81) Hiding in your closet?: Just clothing... and a bunch of knives from my grandfather's knife collection that I inherited. >.>

82) Under your bed: A guitar case, and my bow and arrows.

83) The name of one of your closest/best friends?: Chris Ramm. I've known him forever.

84) Your bad time of the day: In the morning. It takes a while for the pills to get my system going.

85) Your worst fear(s): Being understood by people who would tear me apart.

86) What's the weather like: Too windy and random.

87) Your favorite time of year?: I like the summer when it's acting like summer. But not too hot, please.

88) Your favorite holiday?: Christmas.

89) A material weakness?: Must. Have. Latest. Adobe. Creative. Suite.

90) The weirdest food or drink that you like: Ever seen Balkan food? It's delicious, I swear.

91) At the top of your "to-do list"?: Beryl (client) website.

92) The hardest thing about growing up: Health. Duh.

93) A pet peeve?: I hate how everybody thinks they're fooling you with this or that. Stop insulting my intelligence and obligating me to play along so that I don't have to be a dick and call you out. I'm not the only analytical/observant type out there, so plenty of others are smart enough to figure it out as well. Figure out the best way to say the truth, and then say it. Chances are it's a small deal anyway, and I don't have the time or the energy to get mad anyhow. But failing that, just shut up, or at least know that we know.

94) Your scariest moment: When I got the diagnosis and the doctor first thought the meter was broken since it didn't move, and then told me that if I walked into a hospital they'd legally have to put me in a room and stick an IV in me and stuff, and the nurse who was looking over the results and stuff and gasped, "Oh my god you poor thing." Etc.

95) Your attitude about love?: It exists. I've just got to find it. Somewhere. Sometime.

96) The funniest or most desperate thing you've done to get the attention of the opposite sex?: Nothing. I've actually done shit to get out of the spotlight because I really, really am terrified of all of them.

97) The worst feeling in the world: True helplessness. When all you can do is watch, and you feel like even your attempts to prove that you'd do something if you could are inadequate and unbelievable. I absolutely hate when I can't do anything.

98) The best feeling in the world: Those really rare moments when you realize your head is leaning a little against somebody's shoulder or their's against yours, or when somebody puts their head on your stomach to rest or yours on there's, and it's just quiet and relaxing, and there's an understanding in there. They're great because I don't have to be the one to "open up" since I'm afraid of doing that, it just kind of happens, and it's nice. But very rare.

99) Who sent this to you?: Tagged by Kendrachu.

100) 5 people you tag: Um...
UncleLou
Tempest-was-taken
LadyNightwolf
Jisuk (not that he reads this, but whatever)
Strm (also doesn't read this, but again, whatever)

My gallery was a mess, so I went ahead and moved pretty much everything to scraps, heh. Now there's only four things in the gallery and there's like thirty things in scraps, but I'm happy. I also went ahead and uploaded two deviations for you. Check them out.

***Note: Alright, so you can't read my answers unless you take the quiz and leave a comment that links to your answers. Fair is fair!***

The Deadly Awkward Quiz

Get a blank copy here: [link]

Let's start off by warning the children to just move along. This quiz does not hold any punches in its pursuit of asking the most awkward questions possible, so really, nobody should take this quiz ever under any circumstances.

The rules are simple, and there are only three anyway. First, you have to decide now whether or not you're going to take this quiz. If you start, you have to force yourself to keep going all the way to the end and answer every question along the way, even though you really, really won't want to answer some of them, and then you have to post this quiz as an entry in your Deviant Art journal and get your friends to take the quiz. Second, you cannot use the delete key while you take your quiz or otherwise go back and undo anything you've typed except for fixing typos. So some of your answers might have something like, "Well actually, scratch that, let me start over," or something like that. Third, you can't look ahead on the quiz. That is, if you're on the first question, then no peeking at any of the other questions.

Again, you will have to force yourself to answer some of these questions, and they will get progressively and almost unbearably worse as it goes on, too. But remember that other people have taken the test before you and were able to do it, and they felt the same way (and you'll have the last laugh when you tag others and they have to take the quiz).

This is your last warning! This quiz will eat you alive, but once you start, don't be lame and pretend you never started. If you start, then suck it up and finish the quiz. Here we go!

---QUIZ BEGINS: ABANDON ALL HOPE, YE WHO ENTER HERE!---

1.What is your Deviant Art user name?
Square Bottle

2.Are you a virgin?
Yes

3.What is the user name of the person who showed or made you take this quiz?
Kendrachu

4.Do you think they're a virgin?
Yes

5.What's the sexiest, most attractive thing about that person?
She's playful and a little competitive, too. She gets a look in her eyes that's really cool, and she's got a laugh that ties it all together.

6.You want to have sex with that person. How would you go about convincing them to copulate?
I should not have written this quiz. Anyway, if I wanted to have sex with her, I'd probably, erm, go about it by... hmm. Ha. No. I was going to type something about making her take a weird sexually awkward quiz as a joke, but now I can't do the delete key, so I figured I should explain the ha. Anyway, I'd take her out to get a nice dinner, and then maybe we'd walk back from the restaurant along the beach or something, a boardwalk preferably, and then maybe I'd give her a piece of jewelry or something nice like that. Then we'd watch a movie on the couch, and at the end I'd tell her how I feel, and we'd see what happened, I guess. I'm kinda old-fashioned and stuff I guess. Did I mention I love long walks on the beach and cliches?

7.You must improve the physical attractiveness of that person within one day, so what do you change about them?
I like it when she has her hair up, or gathered in back.

8.Have you ever masturbated twice or more in the same day?
Ehh. Yeah. I really shouldn't have written this quiz. Yes. Fine. See, I was thinking I'd slyly try to get away with not taking this quiz since I wrote it, but oh well. Moving on.

9.If you had to have sex with somebody you regularly eat lunch with (or if you don't regularly eat lunch with anybody, then somebody you otherwise regularly hang out with) of the same gender, who would it be?
I did way too good of a job with this quiz, and I'm definitely not bragging. Grr. Alright. Same gender. Yeah. Oof. Let's see. Collin, I suppose. Moving on.

10.Given the same group of people to choose from but also including the opposite gender as well now, if you had to personally castrate somebody, who would it be?
Easy. Phil, because he always chases me and tries to put clamps on my nipples and weird shit like that.

11.Pick two people on your Deviant Art watch list, and then pick one different bodily orifice for each of them. Summarize in as much detail as you'd like a sexual act between the two people using those two orifices.
UncleLou (nose) and Kendrachu (ears). While copulating, UncleLou massages that spot right behind Kendrachu's ears with his nose because that's her melting spot. That's how he got her into bed. Ha.

12.How many inches of dildo do you think you could force into one of the orifices in the pants region if you absolutely had to?
Good lord. I can't believe I wrote this quiz. Really, I'm a nice guy. In my group, I'm easily the least perverted. Rah. Meh. Anyway, I don't know. Meh. 6 inches? Moving on.

13.Describe your rape fantasy. If you do not have a rape fantasy, then go ahead and take five or ten minutes and make one, and then describe it.
Le sigh. Let's see. A rape fantasy, hmm. Alright. Walking down the street, no. No streets. Start over. I know. This is actually remotely relevant, too. Hmm. Since I wanted to get into swimming, I get my wish, and I get to practice swimming a lot. One day I'll swim a lot of laps, and it'll get late. I'll get out of the pool and walk down to the boys locker room, and I'll be the only one there. But not really. Some girl swimmers will have been hiding in there waiting for me, and they'll grab me, tie me up after a big struggle during which time I'll have impressively shown off my karate skills until I start to get weak since they drugged my gatorade or something (so my fight was valiant, if hopeless), gag me so I can't call for help, and then take me away as I am, just wearing a speedo. They'll take me to some room where they can hold me without anybody knowing it, tie me down, slide me out of the speedo, and that'll be it for poor James. Moving on.

14.You must make a million dollars in one week by making a porno, so it better be good. You're casting five of your friends for the lead roles. Tell us the name of your porno, what your friends do in it, and why you think each of your friends would be good in the role you gave them.
Kendra, Kate, Katie, Phil, Mark. Name of the porno can be "The Peeping Toms." In it, Kendra, Kate, and Katie are all at a sleepover doing all kinds of naughty things. Kendra is the most adventurous because she's evil, Kate is having her eyes opened but is quite a willing learner, and they're both pulling Katie into it, who isn't quite sure if she wants to be involved but doesn't really seem to have much of a choice, so she's nervous and trying to maintain her dignity as it all happens. Meanwhile, Phil is watching all too eagerly from outside the window along with Mark, who is egging him on to take pictures. And because Phil and Mark are evil as well, I think I'll have their hands accidentally touch, and since they're both turned on they too start to make out, and then it's the girls who start watching and filming them. And Phil and Mark definitely both put clamps on each other, and the girls get tons of photos and proceed to create a live feed for the internet. Haha. Pwned.

15.Picture all of your classes all the way back to preschool. You're being held at gunpoint, and the only way you aren't going to be shot is if your current self goes back in time to have sex with one of the classes. What's the furthest class you'd go back in time to have sex with before taking the bullet? (If you make it to preschool, you get to live!)
Hmm. Well, I won't deny it, I'm not ready to die yet. But even so, I could probably only make it back to about 8th or 9th grade. I mean, well, yeah. I just don't think I could go further. But then again, at gunpoint, things change, so maybe I could go back one or two years more if I was actually put in that kind of situation. But. Ehh. Yeah. I'm a wee bit shy, believe it or not. There's a certain irony to that, isn't there?

---END OF QUIZ: NOW GET YOUR FRIENDS TO TAKE IT SO YOU CAN LAUGH AT THEM---

Sorry I haven't posted the past few blog updates here in Deviant Art. Anyway, here's little bit from the actual blog:

"In other news, my family and I are going up to Warner Springs for two days. On account of me having spent a lot of my time on the Visual Flavor webdesign, I think I'll spend the 'retreat' working on stuff for Br***e Linux."

Read the whole blog entry on the actual blog, and please leave your comments here as well: [link]

A little snippit from the actual blog that won't ruin it for you:

"So alright, I thought to myself. Maybe it is all a little bit funny. And now, looking at the entire day… I'm really, really glad I kept my cool, heh, because this has got to have been one of the funniest days of my life. And it's a little bit late now, but then, not too late, so just maybe I will see what everybody's doing tonight. "

Read the whole thing at the blog: [link]

But stretch your lungs and stuff for a second, because you're going to be laughing pretty hard in a second, just to warn ya. XD

A snippit from the current blog entry:

"I've always wanted to get into swimming. I mean, I used to swim a lot and race my friends all the time, and I loved it to the point that I went through a junior lifeguard program when I was a little bit older, but what I always really wanted was to be on an actual racing swim team. I was good, I really was, but I never tried out for any of the teams. When I tell people why, they always think it's kind of silly, and I guess it sort of is. Long story short, I just couldn't come to grips with wearing a speedo (girls would see me!)."

Read the rest (and find out why the post is named what it is) at the blog: [link] (and please leave comments there, too)

A part of the blog post:

"So, filled up the list, finally, but there's definitely still going to be some negotiation going on. For example, I don't know what the deal with the fish gag is. See, they want to take a gag and replace the mouthpiece with a fish, and then make me walk around with it on and make it so I can't take it off. Apparently, me with a little fish in my mouth will be 'cute.' Blahg. See, how are they even going to make it? Where the heck would they go to get a gag before the anime expo?"

Read the rest on the actual blog: [link]

A part of the blog post:

"So I was sort of expecting that it might not actually happen since hey, they'd probably rather buy a 'seme/uke paddle' or something than dress me up as their own little 'kittenboy pet/slave/toy/victim-thing.' I mentioned this to Kendra, and she just giggled and shook her head. Not only are they going to be dressing me up, but — I kid you not — it sounds like they're even going to have a collar custom made for me..."

Read the rest and leave comments on the actual blog here: [link]

From my main blog's [link] entry...

"I've never been to Anime Expo before, but I've known about it for a while and have wanted to go. I've been to Comic-Con several times, but anyway, you're not reading this for that. The story is simple. I'm going to be driving Kendra up to Long Beach, which is where Anime Expo is going to be. However, she is the money, and will be paying for the hotel, and Katie will be paying for dinner. And so the deal is that in exchange for that, they're going to dress me up… as a kittenboy."

Go read the actual blog for more details.

Alright, so as you can tell, I'm really trying to practice my character design. Really, I should probably be working on any of the bazillion other projects I've gotten myself involved with, but hey, nobody said I had to spend forever on the sketches.

At any rate, some people like to be drawn, and some people don't. I love seeing pictures people draw of me personally, because it's a glimpse into how other people see you, sortakindanotreally. Okay fine, so I always just like the way I look. Pah. It makes sense though, because in a way, other people are "dressing" you if you know what I mean, and generally people's opinion of what would look good on you is right.

Anyway, what I was going to say before I confessed my pseudo-narcissism was that while I practice my character design, if you're like me and enjoy it when other people draw you, then step right up and be a model for me! Just catch me sometime when I'm free and I'll draw you or your friends or you with your friends or your friends without you (haha). For now though, they'll just be black and white sketches since I'm just working on getting the shapes down, so don't expect amazing polished cel-shaded masterpieces just yet.

1) Dairien asked me to partner up with him to start a design group to make a little money. After playing with the idea for a while and talking to him, this sounds good to me. We're still thinking of a name. We want to have a green theme for this, which is nice because I've wanted to do something green for a while now. This will probably be done on a small scale for local businesses and stuff like that.

2) As far as my involvement in the FOSS community goes, Christopher has successfully convinced me to start a "vendor neutral art consortium." The idea is that there will be a team of artists who help out free and open source projects that we like, and there'd also be a community built around our web site. Christopher wants me to be the lead (he's exhausted too ya know, and he's already pretty busy earning his PhD), but he'll be around to give me advice and stuff. The scale on this will be large. I still need to pick a name and figure out exactly how I want to do this though. I have some ideas for names though already, but I want to run them by Chris. Yes, Chris, I know I'm the lead and you want me to start making decisions, but you still get to help name it since a lot of this was your idea.

3) A developer and a friend wants me to help them out with a linux (server as opposed to desktop) distribution's artwork. I'm not sure if I'm allowed to say who or what though (you know who you are, so I'll leave it to you to decide how much you want to say, just post in the comments).

4) A different developer and friend wants me to help them out in the indefinite future with a linux (desktop as opposed to server) distribution's artwork. (Same deal with you, leave a comment to give whatever details you'd like).

5) PolitySim. I really should get back to work on stuff for them. I was in the process of contributing a web design to them to help them get going, but then all the drama and the art show kinda took over. Sorry about that.

As always, more detailed on the main blog at GeekPerspective.com [link] .

You probably know by now that a friend of mine resigned from Sabayon Linux. I'm staying by his side. Anyway, I put the info on my blog. [link]

I've got a design that I'd like you all to check out, but first, one of the Sabayon developers I work with brought this to me and said it reminded him of me. I died laughing pretty much.

The world of design can be a ruthless one; not only do you spend most of your time pondering and tweaking minute details that most people find insignificant – and most likely won't even notice – you also get lured into developing anti-social habits like font-spotting and source-code peeping.

Learn to spot the warning signs in time. You know you're becoming a design geek when:

1. You giggle whenever you use the colors F0CCED, EFF0FF and 44DDDD
2. You're in the sun and you look around for a Drop Shadow to sit under.
3. You give your relatives a lecture about color spaces and profiles when you email them your vacation photos.
4. Seing someone use Lens Flare or Comic Sans adversely affects your blood-pressure
5. You maintain a grid system for your refrigerator magnets.
6. You organise your CD collection according to the Pantone chart.
7. You sit at work for eight hours straight just looking at your monitor, waiting for a spark of inspiration that doesn't come.
8. You're up 'til 5am because you came up with the best idea ever while brushing your teeth.
9. The hottest dream you ever had was "Trace contour... Find Edges... Pinch... Extrude... Smudge Stick... Motion Blur.... Sprayed Strokes..."
10. You know Lorem Ipsum by heart.
11. Your kid knows Lorem Ipsum by heart.
12. The preschool teacher complains your child won't color inside or outside the lines – only indicate colors on a separate sheet.
13. Activating your entire font collection makes your computer crash – and you're running OSX.
14. You deliberately butcher your perfectly cross browser compatible site in IE by placing a "Too Cool for IE" banner on it.
15. You prefer a Layer Style of 50% Opacity (or less) on your wife's Satin.
16. You spend $200 on a font for your personal website because "it's the only one where the lower-case g is just right..."
17. Looking at a menu make you go "hmmm, ITC Baskerville italic" rather than "mmmm, lunch!"
18. And when you finally order, you go for Layer Based Slices with Grain Texture...
19. You use words about fonts you dislike that other normal people reserve for fascist dictators and serial killers.
20. Apple+Z is the first thing that goes through your mind if you drop and break something.
21. You refer to colleagues as Strict, Transitional, Loose and the Future Unemployed.
22. You refer to your privates as "the Magic Wand".
23. You actually understand this post and pass it on to your friends.

So now for the design I mentioned. I've been working on the next theme for Sabayon, and this was one candidate. One of the co-leads of the project just came back after being gone for about a month and gave a belated veto, but the other co-lead and I both still like it, and we're going to go ahead and release it anyway. I'll have to get to work making a new theme to be the default though. Anyway, here's the desktop background from the theme.

Be sure to leave a comment that gives it a rating between one and ten, and if you've got time say what you like and dislike about it! I very much like it, and may actually use it to theme the next stage of Bagelwood depending on your honest feedback.



A couple of people are using it as their desktop background already, so if you like it, then just let me know what resolution you need it in or look here to see if your resolution has been uploaded already.

P.S. Since I syndicate my blog through Facebook, Deviant Art, and the Bagelwood Forums, be sure to leave your comment on my actual blog at GeekPerspective.com.